Who you are at your core is not separate from who you are at work. You bring yourself wherever you go.
The core of who you are, your relationship with yourself….
Ideally, it’s clean, true and peaceful. It feels like home, because it is your home.
Your home base. I’m going to out on a limb here and call it self love (though you may have to start from “self like.” )
It’s not about exaggerated self importance. It’s about being as kind to yourself as you would to another person.
Without it, you will feel lonely. Empty. There will be a hole that you try to fill with “things” or even with people. With intensity. With stimulants – drugs, excitement, thrills.
But nothing can fill that hole that was made for just one thing: your own peaceful core of self love, kindness and acceptance.
It is the basis for confidence, resilience, showing up authentically at work.
Maybe growing up, your family didn’t give you that sense of a peaceful foundation, but the good news is that you can build it for yourself at any age.
It’s something the red convertible will never give you. (Don’t get me wrong – I like a nice car as much as the next person, but in the end, it is just a car.)
Can you allow your body to feel more at ease, safe, relaxed, and also alive and alert? It’s the basis for our well being on all levels. And it is the basis for all healthy relationships with others, with all other love.
Self soothing is a crucial life skill, because sometimes you are all you have – and being able to sooth yourself restores your other capacities. It allows your brain to switch back on.
If we don’t let go of stress on some kind of regular basis, it is like coming home from a trip but never setting down our luggage. Set it down. Take a breather.